The feeling of ‘I should be already …’ dominated my life until my early 30s.
I was in constant angst of not being fast enough, chasing more and more things, climbing the corporate ladder but still never got satisfied from what I had achieved.
Throughout my work, I’ve heard the same struggle over and over again too from so many other ambitious people who you think have it all figured out.
And it’s not an age thing – I’ve seen it across the border - anywhere between 20-60+ year olds – usually from high flyers.
However, having been burnt out myself, not once but twice throughout my corporate career, I know how important it is to get a handle on this, rather sooner than later as it can turn into a sickness.
The good news is that it can be controlled and that it is a fairly natural human fear that probably everyone has sometime in their life.
So how to overcome that?
1.) Embrace and appreciate your detours!
Too many of us are focused on the actual outcomes rather than on the process which often leads to disappointment and the feeling of failure because we haven’t achieved the ‘goal’ yet.
However, it’s often those detours that has shown us other sides that we wouldn’t have experienced if we were just going straight.
Every new experience presents an opportunity to learn – from the good but also the bad things.
I never thought I would go into Recruitment which eventually changed my life and got me to where I am now.
My goal was always to become a CMO – that was the reason why I studied marketing.
But once I was in a senior role and didn’t enjoy a single day of it, was anxious about failing any minute and felt I wasn’t good enough, I knew I was sprinting up a mountain which was just the wrong mountain for me.
Funnily enough, May 2017 – just one month into I started my own business – I did get an offer for a CMO role with a tech company.
And guess what – it couldn’t have been any less appealing and I turned it down with a smile.
This was when I realized that I did make the best decision in my life when I grabbed the opportunity and changed direction. I excelled in my new career path so much easier and quicker because it plays to my natural strengths.
So much so that I can now run my own business doing it.
2.) Stop comparing yourself to others!
Big no no no people!!!
I know – it is just too easy to compare yourself with someone you aspire to be and it’s great to have something/someone you aspire to become but this is also what can kill all your motivation and self-esteem.
We usually compare our chapter I with someone else’s chapter XII and don’t know their backstory but only see the shiny part of it. Comparison is the thieve of joy and only fuels angst and anxiety because it stirs our feeling of worthiness.
How to stop comparing?
You have to put blinds on and stop looking left and right as it only slows you down and distracts you from living to your fullest potential.
Stop looking on other people’s profile and dream of living their life.
Go cold turkey for a while and see what it does to you.
You need to follow what feels right for you and not what looks right for you because you think it’s a cool lifestyle.
It’s that simple. But not easy.
And definitely not a once off action.
It’s something we have to do every day and practice over and over because nobody is immune to that feeling of self-doubt. Especially not when we have low days or things go wrong.
So if there is one take out, remember this:
Where you are is exactly where you need to be. Trust the timing of your life but be aware and open to what’s going on to see when the opportunities arise!
Not sure what it actually is you are striving for or want some more clarity on how to find your path, get in touch for a FREE 45-min Strategy Call to get you on your way!